Opinions are like armpits — everybody’s got one and it probably doesn’t need to be seen, smelled, or heard. But there is something to a knee-jerk reaction that is both visceral and taps into our subconscious that really gets to the truth of the matter.
So, I think we should make opinions more like feet. They should smell fresh, be wrapped in cozy Merino Wool, and rarely seen while eating. What follows are hot takes spurred on by some of my favorite Darn Tough socks (and solely the opinion of the writer.)
That's So Basic
The Sock: Women's Solid Basic Crew Lifestyle Sock
Hot Take: When did being basic become such a bad thing? Basic is solid, trusted, and reliable. Instead, it’s considered to be vanilla, when sometimes you really just want vanilla.
Also, now that I’m thinking about it, how did vanilla get such a bad rap? Vanilla is great. Not everything has to have a million bells, whistles, and marshmallows in it to be cool or interesting. Sometimes all you need is a basic you can count on.
The Tortoise & The Hare Scandal
Hot Take: That hare would have won the race if the tortoise hadn’t gotten in his head and had him questioning the overall distance, therefore messing up his pacing strategy. I mean, I guess the tortoise races to win, but still, it doesn’t seem that fair.
But if you’re really talking running, let’s talk about diet. Was the tortoise carbo-loading pre-race or did he get a little synthetic “help” to maintain his marathon stamina? We need answers!
America's Next Top Fashion Show
The Sock: Men's Strut Crew Lifestyle Sock
Hot Take: I want to see fashion shows with a contest or game show component. How great would New York Fashion Week be if it added some elements of American Ninja Warrior, Floor Is Lava, or Survivor? I’d watch that. Probably try to buy the clothes, too.
Garden Party Vibes
The Sock: Women's Garden Party No Show Hidden Sock
Hot Take: I feel like I should stay away from this one. But I will say, it sounds fun. Garden parties always have the best food — tiny sandwiches, festive drinks, cute baked goods. Let’s carry this same level of commitment to other events like Super Bowl parties, yard sales, and book clubs.
The Sock: Kids' Van Wild Micro Crew Hiking Sock
Hot Take: The movie Van Wilder does not hold up. This isn’t the hottest of takes, and to be fair to the movie, pretty much any college comedy ever looks troublesome now. Thankfully, as a society, we’ve moved to a point where comedies like that are no longer funny.
You know who did hold up? Ryan Reynolds. That guy’s everywhere now.
Cow for Pow
Hot Take: The snaking, aggro behavior, and general self-centeredness I display on a powder day are not indicative or reflective of me as a person. That being said, I regret nothing.
There are times to take it slow, times to see the sights, and times to wait for other people, but please don’t ask that of me on a deep powder day — because I am a Pow Cow.
Number 2 Priority
The Sock: Men's Number 2 Micro Crew Hiking Sock
Hot Take: Number 2s should really be called Number 1s because a number 2 has always and will always be a higher priority to take care of than a number 1. Number 2s will make you pull over on the side of the highway, cancel plans, and can turn friends to enemies. Number 1s are usually just an inconvenience. Regardless, the Number 2 sock is actually number 1 to a lot of people.
While hot takes are not always the best to blurt out in a public setting, family reunion, or quiet movie theater, they are a good way to get an unfiltered view of someone’s opinion. If I had to add one more hot take on Darn Tough socks, I’d say that they are comfortable to wear every day, stand the test of time, and are backed by a lifetime warranty that’s so basic it just makes sense.
About the Author
Chris Zimmerman is a copywriter, content creator, and wordplay enthusiast who enjoys spending his time exploring the nooks and crannies of the Pacific Northwest with his wife and daughter. When he’s not chasing around a 3-year-old, he likes to spend his time snowboarding and attempting to surf.